I used this picture from a front page news article on The Vancouver Sun Tuesday, November 24, 2009 to show how the news has created a hype with H1N1. The media accumulated everyones minds with information of this mass destructive flu that is much worse then anything we have seen.  They do not promote the information that people have died from other seasonal flus, and the swine flu is not the first flu to cause death.

Karlene Ostrosky

Canadians should be happy that polygamy has finally been lagalized. Men all over Canada are enthused about the governments decision. Men say that they are ready to start a happier and better off life with their multiple wives. A recent interview with a current polygamist proves that legalizing polygamy has really made his relationships with his wives better. He says “You can never get sick of your wife when you have 5 of em. Wheneva I have enough of one, I go see the otha, and in a way this prevents conflict.” He also made a great point that; “Some men get sick of their wifes cookin’, I neva have to think about that problem cus I got so many wives to make me so many different kinds of dinnas!”

This “rotation of wives”, can truly be a remarkable concept. Men get stressed out when their wives are constantly telling them what to do, when they just want to sit down and relax. This stress can now be prevented when a man simply leaves the house of one wife before she gets a chance to nag at him. When he comes back to visit again, the chores are already done because he was gone for so long and she had to do them herself.
Not only is this great for men, but for women too. Women wont even have the opportunity to be hormonal; they will see so little of their husband, that when they do see him they will be ecstatic, cancelling out all those irritable hormones. Women will also have a load of their shoulders, because now they wont be worrying if their husband is out with other women, they will know for a fact that he is!

Of course this is a dramatization of a polygamous marriage, but I am oppose to the concept. I was reading an article about polygamy in Maclean’s, http://www2.macleans.ca/2009/11/20/what-canadians-really-believe-2/3/ The article rightfully stated that 9 out of 10 women, and 7 out of 10 males oppose polygamy. That 3 percent for men still seems imaginable, to a society where polygamous marriages are illegal. Although, in Bountiful, B.C., many males follow this way of life. Members of Bountiful are part of a breakaway sect of fundamentalist Mormons who do not recognize the mainstream church’s decision more than a century ago to end the practice of polygamy. Because they claim polygamy as a religious right conviction has been tried, and failed over the last two decades.

-Isabel Trzcinski

This idea came to mind as soon as BGanter mentioned us having to remake a photo to give it more complex meaning. There have always been articles about child labour in the news but I did not get this idea from any particular article. I was thinking it related because around the holidays they must have these poor kids just pumping out clothes for us to buy. It gives you something to think about as we enjoy these gifts that have had brutal labour put into them and we are paying a highly inflated price.

Video games are meant to take you away from the reality of the real world. You enter an arena that is created by the game in order to be able to practice activities that may not be socially acceptable in today’s world. Appearances of educational games are increasing in supply.
There isn’t a problem if they are able to provide sufficient entertainment; however, GM is attempting to produce a game where young teens can ‘learn’ to drive. Seeing how they come about this will be interesting but I believe driving takes practice in real world situations or ridiculously advanced simulations.
This sounds like a game very similar to ‘Guitar Hero’ in the sense that you may feel for the general idea of how to play a guitar, but as soon as one makes the switch from plastic to acoustic some don’t even understand how to strum.
Hopefully the streets will remain safe after teens have played this game and have boosted confidence of their driving skills.
Many learning processes have shifted and there are now methods to teach yourself about almost anything. Lectures can be found online, and tutorials about anything possible litter the internet. Will the role of teachers and professionals change in the future?

http://www.vancouversun.com/technology/gaming/sees+driving+future+video+game/2304775/story.html

German Villarreal

The long-talked about UFC -911 “Vengeance” in Baghdad, Iraq was officially added Tuesday to the company’s list of events for 2010. The pay-per-view will be held Sunday, Feb. 21 at the Victory Base Complex, surrounding the Baghdad international airport. “We cannot wait to get to Iraq for UFC 911,” said UFC president Dana White. “The troops love the sport so much, they love the violence, they love seeing some guys face get smashed in. It amps them up, excites them. When we first went to war in Iraq 6 years ago, we knew it was one of the places we needed to get to with live fights, especially now that there is talk about “with-drawing” we need to give our troops the drive to fight more, and what better way than displaying two grown men beating each other to a bloody pulp, it will be beautiful”, he then went on to say, “We will be bringing some of the biggest names in the world to Baghdad plus be giving top Iraqi mixed martial artists the opportunity to showcase their talents in front of a home crowd of a couple thousand U.S. troops” The troops should be getting a nice line-up for the debut event. Though no matches have officially been announced yet Dana White has said that it wont be a regular show, with all the cards featuring U.F.C veterans facing unknown native Iraqi fighters.

This article is meant to show the brutality of mma and compare it to the war in Iraq, how violent and aggressive the soldiers can get. It also makes light of the general American public’s views after 9/11 with most of the population wanting revenge against those responsible for the attacks, even though most of the general public are not fully informed they want to see action, mainly violence.
–Kaalo Dabney
Original article/original pictures (1/2/3)

Specialist warns against relationships with 91 years age difference

With the Twilight books and movies making their rounds it’s easy for those reading to get wrapped up in the romance, but they must be reminded that the relationships depicted are unhealthy.

Although Bella Swan may appear to be the same age as her main love interest, Edward Cullen, there is actually a large difference between the two.  “While Bella is your average 17-year-old teen, Edward is actually a 108-year-old-vampire-stalker” says an expert on all things relevant.

With some confusion over what constitutes a “stalker” we decided to call up political scientist Janni Aragon.  She tells us that: “at times he can be condescending. He watches her while she is sleeping. He is uninvited — and in the real world, that’s called stalking. That’s not the same as being in love with someone so much you’re obsessed.”

With this definition in mind clearly Edward does have some slight “stalkerish” tendencies.

It is clear after reading these books that no one is taking the time to teach children these days the “half-your-age-plus-seven.”  If Bella had been taught this rule then she would have known that she would not be able to date anyone over the age of 21, and Edward should only be in the market for those above the age of 61. (We thank our resident mathematician for this information.)

Considering Edward’s age one must wonder what he is still doing in school. A man (or vampire) by the age of 108 surely should have been able to graduate.  It must be noted that maybe he chooses to stay in school to prey on unsuspecting girls.  Parents should be concerned that their daughters, just as easily as Bella, may fall victim to a pedophile who, just like Edward, has managed to trick the school system into believing they are 17-years-old.

Above all, parents should warn their children against entering into relationships with mythical characters, vampire or otherwise.  Our expert on all things relevant tells us that this is not a healthy relationship.  “A relationship needs two people to properly work. Without two people you’re going to run into problems; Even if in your mind you’re dating an incredibly sexy, sparkling heartthrob.”  Even if it does start out as a harmless vampire, that vampire may turn into a giant, and that giant into a unicorn.

At first read Jasmine Marshall*, 12, thought Twilight was “cool and I wished life could be like this.

“But then I was reading that she only does what he does and she’s kind of needy. She’s a follower and he’s like, ‘I’m the best and I can tell you what to do and watch you and stalk you.’

“I don’t really like that,” said Marshall. “I think it should be more realistic.”

Jasmine’s parents could not be more relieved to have their daughter, but they fear for her safety after leaving the fandom.  We have been informed that those still involved in the fandom have been sending threats directed to the family.

Aside from this, Edward surely must be a bad influence on Bella; not the type of guy you would want your daughter to be dating.  If you do not teach your son or daughter what a healthy relationship looks like they may end up in a situation that looks a lot like Bella’s.

“They need to realize that this is just a movie, just a book, and that it’s not the norm.”

*Name has been changed to protect individuals safety, as well as her dignity.

-Lori

I decided to remix this article because I think all the drama surrounding the relationship portrayed between Bella and Edward is ridiculous. Now I do not read Twilight, so I’m not an obsessive fan, and from an outsiders view it is all very annoying.  I think the girls that read Twilight and suddenly become so engrossed in the fictional character of Edward Cullen that they compare all other guys to him is a little over the top.  I also think that this article does bring up the faults in their relationship but misses the extreme, but still problematic, point that he is a vampire. Because sadly that is what Twilight has created.

Josh Wingrove  Nicole Aylward

Globe and Mail Update
Unpublished on Thursday, Dec. 10, 2009 2:41PM EST

In what could prove to be a rare blemish  “a final blow” to a billion-dollar brand, Tiger Woods – known also as “Woodie” to his 10 new best friends –  was recovering at his Florida lakeside estate “den” last night after a bizarre collision that sent him to hospital earlier that morning with cuts to his face and ego.

Woodie left his home in his 2009 Cadillac SUV around 2:25 a.m. local time – running out to ‘Timmy Ho’s’ for some early morning donut holes. He had pulled out of his home, on a keyhole called Deacon “Divorce” Court, and onto the street, Deacon “Dept” Circle, when his vehicle ran off the road, according to a police report obtained by several American media outlets. Woodie, the lone occupant, drove through a fire hydrant only meters a “chip shot” from his home before striking “hooking around” a tree on his neighbour’s front lawn, and “wedging him deep in the rough” the report said.

His airbags didn’t deploy airbag had deployed only once earlier that day, indicating he was “travelling” slower than 53 kilometres an hour, Florida Highway Patrol said.  Later reports suggest this wasn’t the first time his airbag had deployed on another woman’s lawn.

The seemingly minor collision continued to unfold, as Woodie’s wife, Elin Nordegren, came running from their home, intuitively armed with a 5-iron should the doors on the SUV be locked and she would have to smash the windows to drag her unconscious husband from the wreckage in the driveway.

She used Woodie’s “tool” to break the back window of the Cadillac SUV, thinking that it would be easier to drag the body of her unconscious husband out over the back seats as opposed to opening the driver’s door of the vehicle.  It’s not clear if the 95-pound former model dragged the 180-pound “dead beat” Woodie out of the car.  A neighbor joked that such heavy lifting should be left for Tiger’s caddie, Stevie Williams.

“She supposedly got him out and laid him on the ground. He was in and out of consciousness when my guys got there, and suffered from “irregular panting” local Windermere police chief Daniel Saylor said kidded.

Nordegren was kneeling over him on the wounded beast when police arrived. Woodie had lacerations to his lips, blood in his mouth, and dirty skank on his hands, Saylor said, and was taken to hospital – thus classifying the collision as “serious,” and later sparking a “feeding” frenzy of coverage and cover-up. He was treated and released shortly after.

Alcohol was not involved, the police report said, but ‘transgressions’ were not ruled out.

“Tiger Woods was in a minor car accident outside his home last night. He was admitted, treated and released today in good condition,” a statement from the golfer’s “player’s” representatives said.

The police report indicates “charges are pending.” All that remained of the hydrant yesterday was a small hole in the ground, covered by a road hazard sign.  Spectators comically referred to the site as an “unplayable lie”.

News of a collision involving one of the most recognizable figures in the world stayed quiet, however, for nearly 12 hours. Florida Highway Patrol says they didn’t publicize the incident because the injuries were considered minor, though the police report called them “serious.” implied this was a “major event.”

With news of the crash kept quiet, Woodie was able to return to his estate away from the scrutiny of television cameras. A woman who answered the door of his $2.4-million home last night refused comment to a local Orlando Sentinel reporter. Another Cadillac SUV, undamaged and not believed to be the one involved in the collision, sat in the driveway, the paper reported, raising questions that the accident had occurred at all.

Speculation has swirled as to what caused the crash as Woodie’s representatives remain tight-lipped – unlike some of Woodie’s new friends. Florida officials said tapes of the 911 call will be released next week.  There is now speculation that other tapes involving Tiger could be released in the near future.

The crash came two days after a tabloid, the National Enquirer, published a story alleging that Woodie was cheating on Nordegren, mother of his two young children “cubs”, and having an affair with New York socialite Rachel Uchitel “Kissntell”. The family has earlier sued publications for making such allegations, winning a $183,250 (U.S.) settlement against an Irish magazine that published false nude photos said to have been of Nordegren.  Friends and family agree that Woodie needs to get that bitch on a leash.

Leading celebrity gossip website TMZ.com quoted a Florida law enforcement official calling the crash “a domestic issue.” It was refuted by a Highway Patrol spokeswoman.

“Right now we believe this is a traffic crash. We don’t believe it is domestic issue,” Sergeant Kim Montes said.  However the general public are not “disqualifying” foul play with one of Tiger’s many toys.

PGA Tour veteran Mark Wilson speculated the top-ranked American golfer might have been headed to the gym.

“Knowing him, he was probably leaving for an early morning workout, with one of his 10 new best friends, you know, to just stretch out the old claw” Wilson told the Sentinel.

Woodie’s estate is part of an exclusive subdivision near Orlando, a community set on an Arnold Palmer-designed golf course and a chain of small lakes – Woodie’s property backs on to Lake Palmer, creating disbelief that something so horribly sad as a driveway accident could happen in this picture perfect setting. The neighbourhood is fortified with high brick walls and its own security force – in attempts to keep out money mongers and bar bitches -, and is home to other sports stars such as Cleveland Cavaliers centre Shaquille O’Neal.

Woodie is the world’s top-ranked golfer, with 82 victories and 14 majors to his name. Forbes recently projected he’d be the first athlete to break the billion-dollar mark in earnings. The majority of that, at least $900-million, comes from endorsement deals with such giants as Nike, Buick, Gillette, TAG Heuer, Trogan, and Viagra, which will now be used to buy back his wife for another two years. He has notoriously guarded their personal life – his yacht is named Privacy Deceit – in building the global brand that attracts such companies and Tiger’s now infamous “fans”.

Woodie is set to play host to the Chevron World Challenge in Thousand Oaks, Calif., beginning next Thursday. His spokesman told The Associated Press that he did not know if Woodie planned to play in the event.  This downturn of events in Tiger’s “kingdom” could lead to a large “bite” out of his reputation.  Could such a respectable figure really just be another “playa”?

With a report from The Associated Press

Article taken from:  http://www.theglobeandmail.com/sports/tiger-woods-hurt-in-crash/article1380535/ 

My intention with remixing this article was to initiate thought into the idea that our culture has become overly fascinated with the lives of celebrities and celebrity gossip.  I attempted to do so by applying elements of humor and satire, specifically with reference to golf and infidelity, so as to show how the media plays a significant role in public desire for celebrity gossip.  This was also meant to allude to the manner in which the media profits from such stories and the degree of exaggeration that is involved in the production of celebrity news.  Lastly, this was a comment on the social behavior of males and females in a situation of infidelity, particularly with respect to certain stereotypes that men are always cheaters and women are emotionally-unstable victims of infidelity and dependency, as portrayed and reinforced through media content.

- Nicole Aylward

Lady Gaga performs the first of three sold out shows at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre in Vancouver, B.C., Wednesday, December 9, 2009. Fans left early in disappointment as in the middle of her popular song “Just Dance,” Lady Gaga does nearly the opposite, as she lays down mid song to take a nap. Outraged, fans began to throw things onto the stage and at her, but she wouldn’t wake up. After nearly 10 minutes had gone by without her waking the theatre was practically empty. Although Gaga has made no comments to the incident when asked what happened, she will still be performing her next 2 shows.  Many of the angered fans from the first show are asking to be reimbursed the money they spent on their tickets, however it has not yet been decided what actions will take place.

http://www.vancouversun.com/life/Gallery+Lady+Gaga+drives+wild+Vancouver/2323064/story.html
–Hayley Nirenberg

Original Article:

http://www.vancouversun.com/life/relationships/Money+doesn+happiness+does/1709174/story.html

I read the above article and wrote a response in the point of view from a wise old man who read the article.

I read an article in the paper the other day called ‘Money can’t buy happiness…or can it?’ It got me to thinking about advice that I should pass down to the younger generations and what message I want to get across to them. Now I know everyone thinks advice from an old guy like me is going to be full of significant knowledge, how to reach those lifelong goals you’ve set, how to find fulfillment, how to reach happiness. It’s really simpler than you thought. Everyone spends their life just thinking that there’s something more. Something that’s going to fill that empty void in their heart, something that is going to make them feel like they’ve ‘discovered the meaning of life’. Everyone’s out there just trying to be the first one. The first one to have that feeling of satisfaction, that moment of victory where you feel you’ve conquered the world. Well I’d like to inform you, you’ve got it all wrong. This idyllic state of victory, it doesn’t even exist. Everything you’ve searched for your whole life, it’s been in front of you all this time and everyone has just been telling you to keep looking. All that drive and determination you have exerted, it’s all been a waste. This ultimate level of happiness is not quite what you are thinking it is going to be. I guarantee you’ve already reached that ultimate state of happiness however; everyone has you convinced you’re wrong. So here’s my big fat piece of advice. The missing piece of the puzzle. You’re just going to have to ignore all that new-aged shit about achieving satisfaction and living a fulfilled life. The truth is in fact, money can buy happiness. Let this be your inspiration to how you live your life. Of all the highs and lows I’ve reached in my life, I’m telling you that money is what makes the world go around. Maybe you are one of those under the belief that love is what makes the world go round? I believed that once myself but boy was I wrong. So supposedly the most important thing in the world is love? I mean next to money of course. Well I love money. I love indulging by spending money. I love the smell of money. I love pay day. I love depositing my pay check. I love having a wallet full of money. Hell I even like the feeling of giving money. Who doesn’t love money? Have you ever had a wallet full of money and been discontent about it? Have you ever bought a brand new bright red sports car and been unhappy about it. Have you ever bought your $3.5 dollar dream home with a pool and six car garage and not been happy about it? This is exactly my point. These moments define the highest state of happiness we will ever achieve, so enjoy them while you can and put an end to that search for something more. Whoever started this whole belief that money can’t buy happiness simply was shopping in all the wrong places.

-Amy Brown

Gang violence is expected to rise, as a division of the gang the “Bloods” have branched off from New York and have made there way to Downtown Vancouver. We can expect the Gang the “Crips” to be arriving shortly in the Greater Vancouver region. This remix was inspired by a photo taken on December 2nd, 2009 in the Globe & mail.